A short while back Christof was competing in a contest over at Indiepix. His film EGG REPLACER was busting skulls against worthy foes in attempting to land a spot on the DVD release of a documentary that focused on the careers of the Kuchar Brothers. Long, boring-as-fuck, story short, Christof’s film was announced as the winner by Cory McAbee (director of the masterful AMERICAN ASTRONAUT) at the IT CAME FROM KUCHAR premiere in NYC. Christof is currently wading in a swimming pool filled with blowjobs and success.
He was recently quoted as saying: “Money can’t buy happiness, but blowjobs and success can.”
Watch EGG REPLACER now.
In other news, Sean has finally put SACK LUNCH online. This short was meant to be put up after it played at the Portland International Film Festival back in February, but it got lost in the grand shuffle (along with all those DVD’s that were supposed to have been sent to all those people – NOW ACCEPTING APPLICATIONS FOR INTERNS!).
So, here it is, Sean’s rambling ode to the infrequent validity of batshit insanity: SACK LUNCH
Shot in Ithaca, NY. This short film discusses the merits of belief and the ramifications therein. Hope and fate can be both good and bad. The Whiteman Brothers discuss these subjects as they pertain to GOD and SMASHMOUTH. They’ve distilled the argument down to a parable entitled GOD HAS A PLAN. Hope you find joy and enlightenment.
Heaven in 2007 was Ithaca, NY. Specifically Davey Whitney wheezing on the ground. Watch him and Christof as they play.
CHILDREN AT PLAY
Here is our second lost short-short from an age before iPads (can you even remember a time before ipads?). The short is called UNSPEAKABLE THINGS.
External hard drives are full of mystery. They hold valuable information and die sudden, tragic, deaths. They remind us that nothing lasts forever. They occasionally serve us well and are knick-named as a result of the familiarity of consistent use. They also have secrets.
Sean recently unearthed a series of short-short films hidden deep (talking three folders deep) on a hard drive of his own. They were the result of one day Ithaca, NY day in 2007. The Whiteman Brothers had just completed The Disgusting Little Shiver and Sean was moving to Indianapolis. They decided to take a walk and shoot some short films before he went. Davey Whitney joined them later on.
The first short film (re-assembled from original footage and the directors’ extensive notes) is called: THE SUNSET UPSET.
Christof’s short film EGG REPLACER is currently participating in the Kuchar Brothers’ It Came From YOU Contest. To watch click here. After watching (and critiquing without mercy) you can vote for it.
Now, remember, voting is democracy. Not voting is basically a white flag and a slap to the face of our Grandparents. The same honorable men who fought in a war so that we can enjoy things like Teletubbies. Vote now!
The 1994 Jan de Bont thriller – SPEED – said it best: “Pop Quiz, superstud! Do not go under 55 or GBOOOM! GAME OVER, buddy!”
Well, we here at the Whiteman Brothers admit that, yes, we dipped below 55 m.p.h. a year or so back. As a result the website simply got blown to pieces.
Well we’re back! And with a new, easier to maintain, website – thanks to our BEST BUD Scott Carver. The 1997 Jan de Bont thriller SPEED 2: CRUISE CONTROL said it best: “55 miles-per ain’t a problem anymore. No way, Hotshot! Now just try to stop this giant fucking boat! Well, how about that? Do you feel lucky…punk?”